You ever had a moment where you feel that you have done something to annoy/anger/frustrate/otherwise 'peeve' someone?
I like it to - deja'vu...already seen. It isn't anything tangible - a specific situation or comment made by someone to me.....but rather a feeling. A sense that you have in some way or another, upset someone or something. The balance has shifted and you are waiting for it to fall.
No?
Meh....
Maybe it's just me.....
But nevertheless, I have this feeling. It's an awkward feeling. The kind of feeling you get when you know you have an important meeting the next day, or you are nervous about that doctors appt....a nervous and unbalanced feeling that is out of your control.
I know that someone out there is annoyed with me. And in an even stranger way, I think I know who and it comes as no surprise. Family can be the most cherished and most painful part of one's life. You can love them unconditionally and in the same breath they can cause you the most pain.
I may be the most laid back of all my family but in some ways I am the most sensitive and take everything to heart - whether it is of my own making or theirs. Maybe that is why I am always the punching bag.....
*sigh*
On to other things.....
Lists.....I love them. Most of the time they serve no other purpose other than a way for me to waste time and daydream about all the things I want to accomplish.....whether today of five years from now. I have completed few lists - since they always grow out of control and become overwhelming. However, I continue to use them, create them and find a strange sense of determination and peace when writing them.....
So I think I create a page dedicated to my list rambling.....
Who ever wishes to join me or create something that you wish to share with my viewers....message me. As you all know I rarely openly post comments left by others.....but in this case I will make the exception.
*stand by*
and
Carry on. :)
Monday
Bridal Bliss.
Ok.....I felt that this post should be the conclusion to my Anti-Bride series.
And apparently so did Blogger......because the WHOLE page has disappeared.
Well played Blogger, well played.
So here it is.
A bride is now a wife.....again....
15 Sept. 2012
Parker and I share our first dance as husband and wife.
The irony is we got married a year before.....
So technically, this is our first anniversary dance...
Should be a fun and wonderful timeline to explain to our kids.....
A beautiful & magical night I had planned so hard for.....it was everything I knew it would be.
I married my best friend.
I married a family of wonderful people, whom I adore and respect.
I have two new sisters and a set of parents who I love as much as my own.
I feel complete and content.
I am humbled by the kindness and love shown to us during our wedding and the days that surrounded it.
I am home.
I am ready to hold his hand and walk towards my future.
I am married. And I have never been happier.
Capt. & Mrs. Awesome.
Est. 2012
And apparently so did Blogger......because the WHOLE page has disappeared.
Well played Blogger, well played.
So here it is.
A bride is now a wife.....again....
Parker and I share our first dance as husband and wife.
The irony is we got married a year before.....
So technically, this is our first anniversary dance...
Should be a fun and wonderful timeline to explain to our kids.....
A beautiful & magical night I had planned so hard for.....it was everything I knew it would be.
I married my best friend.
I married a family of wonderful people, whom I adore and respect.
I have two new sisters and a set of parents who I love as much as my own.
I feel complete and content.
I am humbled by the kindness and love shown to us during our wedding and the days that surrounded it.
I am home.
I am ready to hold his hand and walk towards my future.
I am married. And I have never been happier.
Capt. & Mrs. Awesome.
Est. 2012
Thursday
To be wonky or not to be wonky....
To be wonky or not to be wonky......
Yesterday, as I sat on my fat ass doing nothing (which was nice for once...) my tongue felt strange. Now let me put that last comment in context - I have Bell's Palsy, although it is in 'remission' I will always have the 'trigger' to cause another occurrence - therefore a numb tongue is NEVER a good sign.
The first time I felt this sensation I was in the beginning stages of facial paralysis - although I had no idea at the time that was what was happening. This time.....I know.
The philosophical side of me says : Really? A little facial paralysis is nothing. You can recover, you aren't terminal, you can walk, kinda talk and being semi-productive. I could be worse!!!!
The vain and girly side of me says : REALLY!?!?! You are going to fuck up my face days before my wedding. The day I have spent MONTHS and numerous tears, sleepless nights and headaches to PLAN and NOW you wanna play. F**K YOU. All I want are pictures with my husband and family and friends without looking like half my face has melted off. DAMN YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.
With this said, I will say that as of know.....I have no visual signs of a recurrence. My tongue is still feeling a little strange. But nothing else is happening.
The irony here folks - is even if it was happening I can't just go to the doctors or take something for it. It doesn't work like that. There isn't much I can do. Some doctors say that by manipulating certain muscles or getting vitamin shots directly in the affected area....help SOMETIMES. But honestly, I would rather suffer through than have a needle in the face or paralyzed by a chiropractor.
So there you have it.....
Wonky Smile is poised for a return performance.
Maybe. Possibly. Not sure yet....
Stay tuned....
Yesterday, as I sat on my fat ass doing nothing (which was nice for once...) my tongue felt strange. Now let me put that last comment in context - I have Bell's Palsy, although it is in 'remission' I will always have the 'trigger' to cause another occurrence - therefore a numb tongue is NEVER a good sign.
The first time I felt this sensation I was in the beginning stages of facial paralysis - although I had no idea at the time that was what was happening. This time.....I know.
The philosophical side of me says : Really? A little facial paralysis is nothing. You can recover, you aren't terminal, you can walk, kinda talk and being semi-productive. I could be worse!!!!
The vain and girly side of me says : REALLY!?!?! You are going to fuck up my face days before my wedding. The day I have spent MONTHS and numerous tears, sleepless nights and headaches to PLAN and NOW you wanna play. F**K YOU. All I want are pictures with my husband and family and friends without looking like half my face has melted off. DAMN YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.
With this said, I will say that as of know.....I have no visual signs of a recurrence. My tongue is still feeling a little strange. But nothing else is happening.
The irony here folks - is even if it was happening I can't just go to the doctors or take something for it. It doesn't work like that. There isn't much I can do. Some doctors say that by manipulating certain muscles or getting vitamin shots directly in the affected area....help SOMETIMES. But honestly, I would rather suffer through than have a needle in the face or paralyzed by a chiropractor.
So there you have it.....
Wonky Smile is poised for a return performance.
Maybe. Possibly. Not sure yet....
Stay tuned....
Wednesday
Random thoughts of a strange mind.
One cannot live on wedding plans alone.....
At point you will go crazy if you think of nothing but centerpieces, travel plans, rehearsal dinners and other mindful 'wedding' things.
A bride on the edge. Not good.
So here I am to share other randomness.....
1. NPR is my little secret. Why do I feel that I have to hide that? Is there some stigma attached to it? Is it 'uncool' to want to listen to more than just an ignorant talking head on a news channel that so obviously leans to the uber conservative? (Hint: the news channel begins with F and ends in X)
Why should I should I feel self-conscious about listening to current issues; stay up to date with world issues or listen to odd pieces of cultural trivia? Maybe, it's me. Maybe I place that assumption on others......
2. Election Year. As much as I advocate that the American voting base needs to be educated on the issues and not vote with their prejudices......I am getting OH SO tired of the political spin machine. I was even more frustrated by the ridiculous speeches given at the Republican Convention. Yeah, I watched it. It's always good to hear both sides of a story.....even if one is incredibly scary, misinformed and completely out of touch with reality.
I must say at this point that although I am a Democrat (leaning slightly more liberal than most) that I have never been more scared about a the chance of a Republican getting to office than I have been about Romney and Boy Wonder.
This is one hell of a scary election year. Yes, we are facing a national economic crisis, endless military actions, failing school systems, overburdened health care systems and misguided civil rights debacles - BUT the idea that a self-righteous, overzealous bigot with NO idea what the lower/middle class cross section of this country really needs is going to make that better.
Vote on the issues people not the party rhetoric.
3. What the hell is wrong with a school system that doesn't hire BEFORE the school year starts and has a English-speaking MATH teacher teaching a SPANISH class and a SPANISH-speaking teacher teaching a FRENCH class!!????
I weep for this country's future.
4. Why do you think that driving through the space between disabled parking spots is ok? Seriously?
Yesterday I stood in AWE of a woman who, seems to be the missing fucking link, drive between two parked cars (disabled parking spots) WHILE a man in a wheelchair was trying to get INTO his car. He saw this woman coming at him and I have never seen a more frightened and pissed off man in wheelchair.
Absolute disregard for the man or his disability.
Stand there silence....I did not. I proceed to shout at the woman and inform her of her ignorance and impatience. "YOU, woman, are the reason I hate Virginian drivers and WOMAN as a WHOLE get a bad rep." Bitch. Jez-sus.
5. Contacts are marvel of modern ingenuity. Until you get one stuck in your eye or rolled back in your head, touching your brain.
But I look so pretty. :)
6. Mosquitoes here in Virginia have me CONVINCED that someone in this hellish state is genetically modifying them to be as big as quarters and with the ability to breed uncontrollably with each generation getting bigger than the one before. Moreover, they are genetically modified to find their way into ANY area, be immune to EVERY BUG SPRAY known to mankind, take particular interest in Parker and Shadow and are engineered to be stronger than a fly swatter. Its a conspiracy....
End of randomness.
Carry On and see ya at the wedding.
At point you will go crazy if you think of nothing but centerpieces, travel plans, rehearsal dinners and other mindful 'wedding' things.
A bride on the edge. Not good.
So here I am to share other randomness.....
1. NPR is my little secret. Why do I feel that I have to hide that? Is there some stigma attached to it? Is it 'uncool' to want to listen to more than just an ignorant talking head on a news channel that so obviously leans to the uber conservative? (Hint: the news channel begins with F and ends in X)
Why should I should I feel self-conscious about listening to current issues; stay up to date with world issues or listen to odd pieces of cultural trivia? Maybe, it's me. Maybe I place that assumption on others......
2. Election Year. As much as I advocate that the American voting base needs to be educated on the issues and not vote with their prejudices......I am getting OH SO tired of the political spin machine. I was even more frustrated by the ridiculous speeches given at the Republican Convention. Yeah, I watched it. It's always good to hear both sides of a story.....even if one is incredibly scary, misinformed and completely out of touch with reality.
I must say at this point that although I am a Democrat (leaning slightly more liberal than most) that I have never been more scared about a the chance of a Republican getting to office than I have been about Romney and Boy Wonder.
This is one hell of a scary election year. Yes, we are facing a national economic crisis, endless military actions, failing school systems, overburdened health care systems and misguided civil rights debacles - BUT the idea that a self-righteous, overzealous bigot with NO idea what the lower/middle class cross section of this country really needs is going to make that better.
Vote on the issues people not the party rhetoric.
3. What the hell is wrong with a school system that doesn't hire BEFORE the school year starts and has a English-speaking MATH teacher teaching a SPANISH class and a SPANISH-speaking teacher teaching a FRENCH class!!????
I weep for this country's future.
4. Why do you think that driving through the space between disabled parking spots is ok? Seriously?
Yesterday I stood in AWE of a woman who, seems to be the missing fucking link, drive between two parked cars (disabled parking spots) WHILE a man in a wheelchair was trying to get INTO his car. He saw this woman coming at him and I have never seen a more frightened and pissed off man in wheelchair.
Absolute disregard for the man or his disability.
Stand there silence....I did not. I proceed to shout at the woman and inform her of her ignorance and impatience. "YOU, woman, are the reason I hate Virginian drivers and WOMAN as a WHOLE get a bad rep." Bitch. Jez-sus.
5. Contacts are marvel of modern ingenuity. Until you get one stuck in your eye or rolled back in your head, touching your brain.
But I look so pretty. :)
6. Mosquitoes here in Virginia have me CONVINCED that someone in this hellish state is genetically modifying them to be as big as quarters and with the ability to breed uncontrollably with each generation getting bigger than the one before. Moreover, they are genetically modified to find their way into ANY area, be immune to EVERY BUG SPRAY known to mankind, take particular interest in Parker and Shadow and are engineered to be stronger than a fly swatter. Its a conspiracy....
End of randomness.
Carry On and see ya at the wedding.
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